Chris Pine, "Don't act your age in retirement. Need some retirement card ideas for your co-worker? It's doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it." How Much Do I Need?, Net Worth? Scott Elledge, Retired is being twice tired, Ive thought first tired of working, then tired of not. Unknown, "When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. As one chapter ends, another begins, welcome to your new . 15. May you enjoy your retirement! Police are usually shocked that I have a record. For retirement planning, you should consider other Ella Harris, You have to put off being young until you can retire. Financial planning tools and services to put you on the path to the future you want, Blog They arent going to get rid of me that way. It is better to live rich than to die rich. He says to the man, Were going to have to give you a drug test. Without hesitation, the man replies, Cool, which drugs are we testing?, 8. The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. Retirement Wishes Continued: Think about it, now you never have to ask for a day off again. If a robber robs a house under renovation and accidentally leaves his handprint on wet cement. I'm still not retired." After retirement, a 30 minute walk is the best thing to do for your ailments! They aren't going to get rid of me that way." Gene Perret, "Retirement is not in my vocabulary. Sheriff, "Retirement is wonderful. Pennsylvania State Police Department Seal 10. We, your Friends and Brothers, There's more time for leisure but retirees take many different paths. Financial peace isnt the acquisition of stuff. Money is only a tool. helpful non helpful. Some call it 'retirement.' It is the beginning of the open highway. Why did the officer give the ghost a ticket? Nothing happens by accident. And, of course, there have to be a few funny letter boards and signs! Funny I dont remember applying for a job there. Take Us With You! There is a whole new kind of life ahead, full of experiences just waiting to happen. In appreciation for over 31 years Kitty ONeill Collins, I never had the sense that there was an end: that there was a retirement or that there was a jackpot. They say, Speed Limit 65.'. A police officer pulled me over and said, Papers.. Alan Lakein, 7 ways to bring your future into the present, Preparation for old age should begin not later than ones teens. So I do it three or four times a day." - Gene Perret "When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income" - Chi Chi Rodriguez May you enjoy every minute of your retirement. They aren't going to get rid of me that way. I can see a few of you look puzzled. Pinterest. Unknown, Expect the best. Ella Harris, "When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch." SO I RETIRED AND FOUND I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB! Funny cop retirement quotes. Officer: No, I am an undercover detective. Tourist: So, why are you in uniform? Officer: Today is my day off.. Retirement memes: Sometimes the good old joke gets, well, old. Law Enforcement Officer Wife Support Law Enforcement Police Family Police Life Police Force Heroic Men Nypd Blue Gun Humor Definitely! I call it bliss. "The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does.". All the best for an amazing retirement! 53. No gold watch could ever top it. Abigail Charleson. "Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. You've obviously missed it. C K. Spartan Police Theme Party Cop Party Lego Party Policeman Party Officer Party Police Officer 6th Birthday Parties Boy Birthday Birthday Ideas Police Birthday Invitation Printable by TwirlyDesigns on Etsy, $12.00 S Kim Childers Police Wife Life Police Family Retirement is not impossible, get ahead with these tips to get ready! The claw Enforcement. Here it is, she said. Quote #20. I get to enjoy all the things I never stopped to notice on the way up. Why did the police arrest the turkey? When caught speeding, an airman on leave tried to talk an officer out of giving him a ticket. You're a free person! George Burns, People ask me what Id most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. Before you spend, earn. How can you tell if you are looking at a police glow worm? Cop to perp: Did you kill this man?, Perp: No, he died of natural causes. Cop: He was shot! Perp: Right a bullet killed him. Theres a man in the town whos stealing the wheels of police cars. May we live up to your example. The police caught a person erasing peoples criminal records. Before you write, think. Why was it hard for police to catch the tree bandit? 39. It is the beginning of the open highway." Police Retirement Quotes and Plaque Wording Ideas #653-1 "Thin Blue Line" Police Retirement Plaque Wording Idea Honoring Your Service Presented to Retired Sergeant In appreciation for over 31 years of loyal and dedicated service to the People of the City of New York. I can't take it any more! Leonard Cohen, I need to retire from retirement. Inspirational Retirement Quotes Funny Quotes About Retirement Funny Retirement Quotes For Women Maxine Retirement Quotes Funny Life Quotes Abraham Lincoln Quotes Albert Einstein Quotes Bill Gates Quotes . Officer: I notice your eyes are bloodshot. George Burns Retirement life: seen it all, done it all - Can't remember most of it! Explore the options below for sample police retirement quotes, sayings, best wishes and more. Congratulations. You will always have a home here. We, the Officers of the Hartford Police Ward, Always have a plan, and belive in it. 29. It's doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it." - Gene Perret "I enjoy waking up and not having to go to work. You've broken the law. Why did the police arrest the turkey? Five year old Little Johnny was lost, so he went up to a policeman and said, "I've lost my dad!". Personalized Crystals to Celebrate Life's Moments 2023 DIYAwards.com. You can get more money, but you cannot get more time. Here are some humorous options. Did you hear about the criminal who stole a lamp? Today is my graduation day. What do you call a cat that was caught by the police? Mark Twain, A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams. Law enforcement officer retirement quotes are always inspiring, our samples are uplifting and warm but you can customize your gift plaque with any quote you choose. To honor a retiring county sheriff, deputy, or other law enforcement officers or bid farewell as they embark on the next step of their professional career with this inspirational police quote and saying. Retirement is not in my vocabulary. A personalized best wishes and inspirational quote is an ideal way to honor the retiring police officer who spent his or her lifetime protecting and serving the community. Retirement caps a career and opens the door to long-anticipated plans and dreams. Why did the coffee call the police? Unknown, "My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law." Everywhere I touch it hurts.". What a great silence in the office, since we don't hear your.. really not funny jokes! The job you waited for for 50 years! Youll Laugh (or Cry) When You Read These Famous Quotations About Retirement. Gene Perret, "My father calls acting 'a state of permanent retirement with short spurts of work.'" They arent going to get rid of me that way. Betty White, I need to retire from retirement. Sandra Day OConnor, Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life. Kitty ONeill Collins, Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save. Will Rogers, A retired husband is often a wifes full-time job. Ella Harris, When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income. Chi Chi Rodriguez, I always likened retirement to falling off a cliff, and then you have to kind of brush yourself off. Steve Young, Retirement at 65 is ridiculous. Why did the policeman stop you on your way home last Thanksgiving? Funny police retirement quotes sayings. "Half our life is spent trying to find . Me: I'd like to interview the bartender wearing high heels and a leopard print dress. 47. Walter Cronkite, "I'm always announcing my retirement. Get Started Their names are Bed and Couch. A bloody clock!" To the People of Barnwell County, SC. Sheesh, I thought you were the cop here., Perp: With my parents. Cop: Where do your parents live? Perp: With me. Cop: Where do you all live? Perp: Together. Cop: Where is your house? Perp: Next to my neighbors house. Cop: Where is your neighbors house. Perp: If I tell you, would you believe me? Cop: Tell me. Perp: Next to my house.. What is a police officers favorite type of tag? Once police officers join the force, they are part of a tight-knit law enforcement community. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples." David Gill 0 Likes The current institutionally provided retirement plans will not cover people's needs upon retirement. "The more your money works for you, the less you have to work for money.". Do you have an investment policy statement? shop 5STARGRAPHICDESIGN. Police say they have nothing to go on. # funny # animation # illustration # woman # drawing # happy # fun # party # stars # day # happy # fun # celebration # work . Custom and user added quotes with pictures. The ground is part of nature. An officer stops a man for speeding and notices hes not wearing his required prescription glasses. more on this quote . "Best wishes for an awesome retirement. as He inspires you every day. When You Retire, by Tree.Cards When you retire, you get to sleep more, We, Your Friends and Brothers, Jim Rohn, Know what you own, and know why you own it. - Jonathan Clements. 2. Ernest Hemingway, Theres no retirement for an artist, its your way of living so theres no end to it. You Never Swerved From the Path of Duty. Here's a nice variety of rhyming retirement poems that you may share with someone that is about to retire or has recently retired. Why did the coffee call 911? "Here's to a well-deserved and happy retirement! Below you will find our collection of inspirational wise and humorous old funny retirement quotes funny retirement sayings and funny retirement proverbs collected over the years from a variety of sources. While I love my job, I look forward to living life on my own time and having the freedom to travel with my husband, Kevin. I wish I can also retire right now so that I don't need to call anyone boss. 33. Retirement is wonderful. General Letter Board or Cake Sayings for . I got a call from the police station saying they want to interview me. On what show do police officers solve crimes committed by garden gnomes? Why couldnt police notify the family of the murdered baker? The police are working tirelessly to catch him. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter." - Mark Twain "Retirement: no job, no stress, no pay!" - Unknown "Retire from work, but not from life." - M.K. Have you ever been pulled over for a speeding ticket that you didnt think you deserved? Give Without Remembering and I thought retiring was when you are tired and go to bed." Disclaimer: The content, calculators, and tools on NewRetirement.com are for informational and educational purposes 11. Take us with you! Get to know the people behind the company and the mission behind the work, Enterprise Hugh Hefner, Often when you are at the end of something, youre at the beginning of something else. to the New York Police Department. Check out our funny police quotes selection for the very best in unique or custom, handmade pieces from our prints shops. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}). Fred Rogers The best is yet to come! I cant get old; Im working. Unknown, "A retired husband is often a wife's full-time job." Before cuffing the artist, he looked at the mural and said, Now that is bold.. A woman was speeding down the road and was pulled over by a female police officer. A week after my wife went missing, the police told me I should expect the worst-case scenario. I wish i can also retire right now so that i don t need to call anyone boss. Use these famous quotes to send a boss, co-worker or teacher off to a happy and healthy retirement. Officer: "I have to give you a ticket for not wearing your glasses." Driver: "Officer, I have contacts." Officer: "I don't care who you know, you're still getting a ticket." New England Patriots/Giphy 31. 59. Have you been eating donuts?, 6. There is no requirement that police stop a person who enters a police station and states that he wishes to confess a crime or a person who calls the police to offer a confession because volunteered statements of any kind are not barred by the 5th Amendment. The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. Jonathan Clements, I have never liked working. The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, 'Got stuck, huh?'. We can no longer afford to scrap-pile people. All content, Teachers: For teachers, the work is never done. Happy Retirement Quotes & Sayings In this section, you'll find both inspiring and funny retirement quotes you can add to a retirement greeting card message. 2) Old age, fragile bones, doctor visits, medical checkups and a weak bladder - are you still looking forward to retirement? Funny Retired Police Officer Golf Retirement Gift T-Shirt 4.8 (9) $1999 FREE delivery Wed, Mar 8 on $25 of items shipped by Amazon Amazon Merch on Demand 5.0 (10) +4 colors/patterns Retirement Gift Ideas Police Officer Men or Women Mens Retired Police Officer Law Enforcement Sheriff Retirement T-Shirt 5.0 (1) $1799 Did you hear they arrested the Energizer bunny? Source Unknown, Gods retirement plan is out of this world. Unknown A retired husband is often a wife's full time job. Unknown, "Retirement: World's longest coffee break." 38. The goal is to enjoy it to the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money.". The cop asked to see her drivers license. Some call it retirement; I call it bliss. Betty Sullivan, In retirement, I look for days off from my days off. Mason Cooley, Its paradoxical that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesnt appeal to anyone. Andy Rooney, Work is the curse of the drinking classes. Oscar Wilde, The company gave me an aptitude test and I found out the work I was best suited for was retirement. Unknown, Sometimes its hard to tell if retirement is a reward for a lifetime of hard work or a punishment. Terri Guillemets, I think that retirement is the first step towards the grave. Hugh Hefner, Often when you are at the end of something, youre at the beginning of something else. Fred Rogers, Retirement is not in my vocabulary. To me, a job is an invasion of privacy. Unknown, He who laughs last at the bosss jokes probably isnt far from retirement. Unknown, There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working. Robert Half, Retirement: its nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to learn to get along with less cheese. Gene Perret, You cant retire from being great. Unknown, Some of the best memories are made in flip flops. Kellie Elmore, We make a living by what we get. tags: investment , investments , money , money-issues , money-management , money-quotes , moneymaking . Confucius, "Well, I didn't grow up with that word 'retirement' as part of my consciousness. Gene Perret, "I enjoy waking up and not having to go to work.